Kink & BDSM

You’re forging your relationship path.

It’s exciting, freeing, and the stuff of fantasies – except when it isn’t.

Like any relationship, D/s relationships can be confusing, overwhelming, and stressful.

Unlike vanilla relationships, knowing where to turn for support when needed can be difficult.

And you’re not sure you even know what you want, with all the possibilities and no roadmap.

Letting go of “normal” is hard.

You were taught what healthy adult relationships look like. You may have spent much of your adult life in egalitarian relationships. And something about BDSM doesn’t seem – normal.

It’s not! And that’s part of what makes it appealing. Normal is different from ethical.

Yes, there are still rules to follow, but they might differ from the ones you grew up with.

We make our own rules. While that can be exhilarating, it can also be scary.

Misunderstandings abound.

What happens when you have conflicting needs in your power dynamic?

What if you and your partner meant different things when talking about submission – and you only found out when something went wrong?

Are you clear on what consent framework you’re using?

You might have started out thinking you were into something and only just realized you weren’t. What do you do now?

Translating fantasy into reality.

Power dynamics allow you to explore fully what you want and need from others. You get to customize relationships according to your desires.

And you can explore parts of yourself that you’ve kept hidden for fear there’s something wrong with you.

But no, this is not 50 Shades stuff (nor should it be). People get hurt, and dishes must be done.

Fantasy is a fun jumping-off point, but it doesn’t set you up for a healthy, satisfying D/s relationship.

It’s time to actualize your vision.

With support from a kink-competent professional, you will deepen your self-awareness about your wants and needs.

We can explore different models and roles in D/s to determine what aligns with your desires.

I’ll help you learn how to communicate within your dynamic, build trust, and talk to your partner about changing interests.

There are many creative ways to build authentic relationships that meet both our needs and our desires. We all deserve this. Get in touch so you can start creating the relationship you want.

I am also a trauma therapist. Trauma so often gets in the way of understanding consent and seeking pleasure, and we can work through that together.